The Heel War
by Autobotschic
Summary: "Oh. And I wore heels and everything," June tsked. "Ms. Darby, so unexpected to see you here," a voice clucked. "Oh great. We're screwed," Jack sighed. An utter crack fic birthed by one sentence and an overactive imagination. Warning, one little bitty cuss word. Because June is annoyed.


Extreme crack ahead, be warned. And for the record, I regret nothing.

Transformers (c) Hasbro

Shadow Stalker (c) Me

* * *

The roar of an engine echoed throughout the base as June Darby sped in, applying the brakes then turning the car off. She hopped out of the front seat, running over to her son and giving him a hug.

"I finished my shift at the hospital early, thought I would stop by," she explained with a small smile, before turning to Ratchet. "Doctor."

Ratchet looked over his shoulder, shrugging and turning back to the computer. June smiled and looked up at the femme. "Arcee."

Arcee smiled in return, shifting slightly and putting a hand on her hip.

"So.. Where's Optimus?" June asked, glancing about before turning back to Ratchet.

"He's off on a scouting mission with Bumblebee, sorry to disappoint," the medic gruffly replied.

"Oh. And I wore heels and everything," June tsked.

"Mom!" Jack squeaked. He knew if a certain bot got wind of this..

"Ms. Darby, so unexpected to see you here," a voice clucked.

"Oh great. We're screwed," Jack sighed. He turned around, and blinked, dumbfounded, when he saw a women instead of another bot.

June froze, turning around and looking at the voice's owner. The women had sharp, ice blue eyes that drilled into the nurse. Dark brown hair with silver highlights fell about mid back, and she was clad in a black t-shirt with gold and green on it, and dark brown cargo pants. The thing that got June's attention the most though was the sheer height the woman acquired through the heels on her scarlet boots.

"And you are?" June asked, placing her hands on her hips.

"Angel of Darkness," the woman replied with a wicked grin.

Arcee instantly looked uncomfortable, and kept glancing into the corridor the woman had come from.

"That's not a name," Ms. Darby replied with a scoff.

"You didn't ask my name. You asked who I was. I am the Angel of Darkness," the woman replied in a sing-song voice.

"Humans.." Arcee warned, still fidgeting.

"I know, Arcee," she shot back with a low growl.

Two engines roared, signaling the arrival of Optimus and Bumblebee as they pulled in. Braking to a stop, they transformed as Optimus instantly noticed the new woman with a small frown.

"We've discussed this," he vented.

The woman pouted, fizzling away and leaving June's jaw gaping. Pede steps echoed down the corridor, ice blue optics flashing at the bot came to a stop just inside the main room.

It was a femme about the same height as Ratchet, with piercing ice blue optics and silver audio antennae with a helm crest that looked vaguely like Optimus's. She was primarily black with scarlet highlights on her pedes, golden wrist guards, and a golden chest with a lime green fox-like shape within it. Her shoulders were spikes, each with a tire on the back. The other two tires each made up the bottom of a pede, a scarlet heel to keep it from rubbing against the floor. A pair of black jet wings flicked idly on her back as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Oh look. Shadow Stalker's come out of hiding for once," Ratchet snarked, turning around fully and looking over Optimus and Bumblebee for any wounds.

"I own the shadows, Ratchet. I don't need to hide," Shadow purred darkly in reply. Optimus vented softly, shaking his helm.

"When did she arrive?" June asked, she didn't see the femme yesterday.

"I've been here," the femme replied with a grin.

"But you weren't here yesterday when I was," the human female shot back.

"Yes I was. I was standing in this corridor watching and observing you," she replied.

"Stalkerish. Lives up to her name," Miko grumbled, looking up from her position on the couch.

"No, it's just a Gladiator thing," Shadow yawned.

"Gladiator?!" June gasped.

"Mmhm. I kill people for fun," the black femme stated with a wicked grin.

"Shadow Stalker, what did I say about scaring the humans?"

"Sorry sweetspark."

But it was too late, June had already shoved Jack into the car and sped out of the base. Shadow grinned broadly, hugging her sparkmate.

"Well, that's two less humans we have to deal about!"

The glare Optimus gave her suggested otherwise.

* * *

A few hours later in the dead of the night, a 1977 Pontiac Trans Am Firebird pulled into the Darby's driveway, engine idling. A horn blared, scaring the two humans awake.

Jack wondered outside in his boxers, before nearly dying when he saw Shadow's alt form in his driveway.

"Jack, go put some clothes on," Shadow's voice sighed from the radio.

June came out as Jack rushed in, spying the car. She stormed up, cursing under her breath.

"Just who the hell do you think you are?" the nurse spat. Shadow transformed, kneeling down to try and get close to the human's height.

"I am Shadow Stalker," she turned with a faint smirk.

June screamed, but the sound was muffled as Shadow's holoform covered her mouth. "Hush! I just wanted to come and apologize," the gladiator grumbled.

Muffled grumbling. Shadow took her hand away and raised an optic ridge. "What was that?"

"You're forgiven," June grumbled, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Good. Now if you excuse me, I was actually on my way to go kill some Cons at a mine. I shall be back," Shadow stated, transforming and backing up.

June sighed, turning to walk back inside before she was stopped. Shadow had left her with one simple statement before she shot off down the street.

"Oh, and June, my heels are taller then yours."


End file.
